Funny One Liners, Jokes

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The problem with money is too much of it belongs to people who aren't me

I'm not going to lie to you. You are very attractive when I've had six or nine beers

My wife, it’s difficult to say what she does....she sells sea shells on the sea shore

Why are all the unpacking instructions inside the box?

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating. - Oscar Wilde

My wife and I married for better or worse. She couldn't do better. I couldn't do worse.

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