Indian HomeMaker do visit- PISCES [Feb20-Mar20]- Many people walk in and out of our lives. But only true friends leave footprints in our hearts. You left yours in your friends' hearts. And damn! You have a very big foot!!
PISCES (Feb20-Mar20) - Whenever you feel the world is full of darkness and empty, just come and hold my hand. I'll take you to an eye specialist....
PISCES [Feb20-Mar20]- Your bf or gf will pull you into his/her bedroom, switch all lights off, take you to bed, and under the blanket, will show you the new radium watch.
Showing posts with label funny horoscope. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny horoscope. Show all posts
AQUARIUS [Jan21-Feb19]- You are the best. You can see tea in tea cup, but can others see the world in World Cup? No. You can send your address to a person's house. Can the person send his house to your address? Again, you are the best.
AQUARIUS (Jan21-Feb19) - 5 wonderful things about you:
1. You are very kind hearted.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Wondering where the other four are? I'd say it is enough! Only one joke about you per day.
CAPRICORN [Dec22-Jan20]- While travelling to some places, you will have a need to speak English this way-
*Don't dare talk in front of my back!
*I have two daughters and both of them are girls.
*Take 5 cm wire of any length.
CAPRICORN (Dec22-Jan20 ) - Your brain is a master piece. It is divided into two, the left part and the right part. In the right, nothing is left. In the left, nothing is right.
SAGGITARIUS [Nov22-Dec21]- If you fail to complete a task assigned for you to work on a computer, tell your boss that the English alphabet keys on the keyboard were jumbled and you spent all the time arranging them in alphabetical order!
SAGITTARUS (Nov22-Dec21) - Your lover will reveal that he/she is on a mission to forget you, hate you, hit you, kick you and finally kill you. The mission's name is MISSION IMPOSSIBLE.
SCORPIO [Oct23-Nov21]- ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Any guess what these are? Question marks? I can see how careless you are about your health. These are the screws fallen from your brain. Kindly fix.
SCORPIO (Oct23-Nov21) - Rose is always rose, whether it is in a golden pot or a trash can. Likewise you are a good person, no matter you are in prison or an asylum.
LIBRA [Sept23 -Oct22]- If you love your partner more than your partner loves you, then it's "Gone With The Wind" climax in your life. Or if it's vice versa, it is "Romeo And Juliet" climax. So make sure of the balance.
- LIBRA (Sept23-Oct22) - You will be asked to fill up these blanks with "Yes" or "No"-
- 1. ______, I wipe my dirty nose with my shirt or top.
- 2. ______, I am a super geek.
VIRGO [Aug23-Sept22]- Do you want to make one million dollars in market? I have a very very simple trick. Start with two million dollars.
VIRGO (Aug23-Sept22) - I regret to tell you that you have brain tumor. But be happy! It proves that you have a brain!!
LEO [July23-Aug22]- Don't visit Asian countries. The people have very bad habits. At a church, a guy lit his cigarette from the candle lighted for the Lord. I was almost shocked and I dropped my Vodka bottle.
LEO (Jul23-Aug22) - While converting the sentence: " Children in the dark make mistakes," into its passive voice, don't write: " Mistakes in the dark make children!"
CANCER [June22-July22]- Don't miss any opportunities to work for a fat guy who doesn't brush. Because you will learn three facts from him-
*You can't touch all your teeth with your tongue.
*After reading this, you will try it.
*Now you will smile.
CANCER (Jun22-Jul22) - You and your lover will be eating cookies, looking into each other's eyes. Your lover, out of love, will ask, " What are you thinking about me at the moment?" You will say, "I am thinking that you are eating more cookies than me."
GEMINI [May22-June21]- When you are ill, admit yourself at We Make You Well Asylum. You will win a Porsche's photo, HP Touchscreen computer's box, a chance to say Bon Voyage! to the passengers of Airbus A380 and an exclusive opportunity to invite me for dinner at your house. Hurry! Limited Offer.
GEMINI May22-Jun21 - When a kid asks you the sum of one and one, don't ask for a calculator!
TAURUS [Apr21-May21]- You are not strong enough in romance and relationships. If behind a man's success there is a woman, behind your failure, there are ten women. If you are a woman, it is the other way round.
TAURUS (Apr21-May21) -Most people I know are normal, sane, cultured, decent, intelligent and well behaved. Thanks for breaking the monotony!
ARIES [Mar21-Apr20]- In winter, I'm sure you will be happy. You go out, dance and sing. You splash water... ain't I right? Every frog feels the same.
ARIES [Mar21- Apr20]- Your touchscreen computer will accuse you of sexual harassment.
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